Mama's Famous Gate

mama's famous gate , 1 year 10 mos old

First day at daycare. Lukie was only 1 year and 10 months old back then. It was a big decision for me and Boogie to even think of leaving Lukie that young to other's care. We were left with no choice as coping up with the piling bills wont be that easy for a couple who is new in a country. The slot for 10 toddlers was completed but my employer helped to put Lukie as the first priority on the waiting list. We have to wait for at least 1 baby to "cry loud and be out" (Hahaha) before our son would be accepted. School started September and we had the call mid November (2003) and we were requested to go to the school next Monday.

My little toddler was more excited on going out of the house as he still doesn't know that this day starts his life to be away from Mama. Boogie has to go to work so just mother and son went for the big day. The gate was already close but I was there on time as instructed. Oh well, I can just press the buzzer.

Of course good Mamas bring their cameras, so "pictures first" and capture the first among all the first days of school. Done! Then I buzzed and we went in. A lady came to meet us by the door with a puzzled face. 'Ayyy' WRONG! Day care was transferred to another building 500 meters away 3 years ago.

During the first week, parents were to stay with their children in the classroom for three days. 4th and 5th day, all parents may leave but has to stay near the campus in case her/his child will throw uncontrollable tantrum. Same goes at the beginning of Scoula Materna.

The succeeding week, I have to go back to work after almost 2 years of not working. But, when I was about to go out Lukie was tightly clinging on to me and was crying. The teacher took him to their class room and I was left with Ernesta(another teacher ) who was consoling me. I was crying too and in the verge to call up work and tell them I'd quit on my first day with out even showing up.

Ernesta told me that its a very normal separation anxiety and assured me that Lukie will calm down in 10 minutes soon as Barbara will let him play with the puzzle my son was fond of the prior week. She asked me to go but I asked her if I could go see Lukie first. She told me I'll just prolong the anxiety and my son will sense there is REALLY danger in leaving him. So I left but I told them to call if Lukie won't stop crying.

On my way to work, the teacher phoned up with the speaker phone on and I could hear Lukie laughing and counting the puzzle pieces he was playing with. The more my tears came out.

To be honest, I wasn't crying because I can't let go of my son. It was guilt that is making me do so. He was still a baby and I should be the one taking care of him instead of other people. His important first 5 years of development which I have the biggest role to take part with is lessened by the hours I spent at work.

When I came back for him after 5 hours, he seem didn't miss me at all!