SIBLING RIVALRY (Part 3)

I'm the eldest among six girls and next to me is my sister, Noeda, with only a gap of one year. Among all my sisters, she's my "fighting-mate" during our younger days. Punching, kicking, nose bleeding and shouting would often raise our Dad's blood pressure. Dismayed, he would always tell us that it would be worse if we were boys.

As we age and eventually had a family of our own, I look back at it as part of growing up. A normal stage we have to go through or a part of the process where we acted out who and what we are that time - KIDS.

Writing this echoes my father's words when we do it rough. He would say: "Enjoy these short days being together as sisters. Someday you'll leave this home and will have a family of your own. Then no matter how you would want to turn back time to be young all together again, you can't 'uray in-nanges kayu ni dara'(even if you cry out tears of blood)." Indeed, he was right!

Last Sunday, we celebrated Noemi's first birthday. My sister Noeda and his husband Irven may look tired but they did well in making my niece's day a special one.

Noeda emailed me before her daughter's birthday about her children's(Roldan-2 years old and Noemi-1 y/o) early display of what we used to do - FIGHT! My Sister said:
"They don't really fight(YET), its just that Roldan would often slap Noemi for no reason. He pushes her all the time specially when Roldan is holding food or a toy. He thinks her little sister is going to get it away from him.

For Noemi, its like like she could sense it well that there is danger when Roldan comes to her. She would always run away from his big brother. Again, like she has a wiser mind of her own, Noemi does her pay back when Roldan is asleep. She would pull his brother's hair and pokes his nose hahaha...."

Excerpt from Your Child: Development And Behavior resources:

Be There For Each Child:

1. Set aside “alone time” for each child. Each parent should spend some one-on-one with each kid on a regular basis. Try to get in at least a few minutes each day. It’s amazing how much even just 10 minutes of uninterrupted one-on-one time can mean to your child.

2. When you are alone with each child, ask them once in a while what they like most and least about each brother and sister. This will help you keep tabs on their relationships, and also remind you that they probably do have some positive feelings for each other!
3. Listen—really listen—to how your children feel about what’s going on in the family. They may not be so demanding if they know you at least care how they feel.

4. Celebrate your children’s differences. Let each child know they are special—just for who they are...read more HERE: