Wednesday, 22 August 2007

Bees And Ducks

Mama and Dad

The Secret Life Of Bees by Sue Monk Kidd is a book that will always remind me of my mother - Normie. Today is her birthday. She should have been 53 if she’s still around to spoil her grandchildren.

“The next ten thousand years she would fix my hair. She would brush it into such a tower of beauty, people all over the world would drop their harps just to admire it. You can tell which girls lack mothers by the look of their hair. My hair was constantly going off in eleven directions...” Lily’s narration from the said book - Lines that first struck me when I was already on the third page.

Normie was born in Balatoc Itogon Benguet. Her family lived in Batuang Itogon who came all the way from Tadian Mt. Province for the gold mines. His father Felix Dulaycan and her mother Lydia, whom I can’t remember her maiden name, had six children. They too were young orphans when my grandmother Lydia died and Mama Normie at a young age became her siblings’ keepers.

I was in Grade 5 back then, I came home from school when my two sisters were spooning the peanut butter from the container. I asked them why they’re eating it with out bread and they told me, “Mama had let us!” That was our last 'merienda'(snack) with her and we were so clueless how weak she was that time.

I have so many beautiful memories of her that could surpass the number of pages to Sue Monk Kidd’s book though I only spent 12 years with her - Why she had so many shoes, her scent and a lot more.
Aunt Betsy, Irish, Mama, Me, Noeda and Dad

I can never forget the laughter I drew out from her when she can’t keep up on chasing me as she holds a ‘tsinelas’(flip-flops). She was in fury to whip out my butt because I made my sister cry and from a cautious distance I watched her trying to stop and hide her laughter as she says, “ Lovelyn, kala dyay! Darasim”( You come here! Hurry up!).

I always picture her with her dance as she sings her “Ducky Song”:

“Five little ducks went swimming one day.
Over the pond and far away.
Mother Duck said, “Quack, quack, quack, quack.”
And only four little ducks came back...”

I was singing this song to my 8 month old baby as I was feeding him last week. My eldest son Lukie was on the couch intently listening to my song and I saw his worried face. When I came to the "last 1 duck who went to swim and then no more duck came back", he was already in tears. I knew why so I went next to him and explained that the ducks grew up. They went to have a family of their own that’s why they did not go back to their Mama. “Just like me and Papa”, I said. “We came here in Italy and Lolo Danny and Lolo Mondax stayed in the Phillipines.” I told him and his face lit up. He was smiling again and went for the tissue for us to wipe
our eyes.

I know my mother duck is up there with harps and cellos played by the angels as she sings her “Ducky Song” on this day of hers.



Your mama must be having tea with my mama up in heaven Lovelyn. Lukie is such a sensitive soul. I also sang the same songs that my mama used to sing to me as a child. I didn't know your mom also passed away. She was such a fashionista like my mom when she was single.


For sure Tina and they're talking about our blogs. "Kids these days, they write a lot!"..."How do we call it during our time?"...:-)

I had an uncle, a sister and a cousin having Lukie's sensitivity. I didn't know even that could be passed through the blood line.

Fashionista indeed! My Mom and Lola didn't used to get along when my mom dresses us up with a tube blouse and shorts.

Cheers to our great Mamas Tina!

Bill Bilig

This post reminds me of my mom singing "The Lord of the Dance" while she was cooking our breakfast during early mornings. She will be celebrating her 75th birthday next year :-)


Wow Bill, you are so lucky to have your mom all these years! 75 years, that's really great. She must have raised you well and I bet she's proud of you too specially when she reads your blog.

Bill Bilig

Hehe, I hope I am a good son. Thankfully she does not read my blog (may internet sa Sagada but they don't have one at home) because if she does she might have hit me in the head for spending a lot of time blogging :-)

Yes, I'm lucky she's my mom. I hope to listen to more of her stories and to hopefully write them like what you are doing about the story of your Lolo Ramon which I enjoy reading.


Novice Blogger

i had the same experience with the flip-flops ass-chase with my mom. i smile everytime i remember those moments coz i'm reminded of my katigasan ng ulo. hehe.

i have the book the secret life of the bees but i only read the first few pages. perhaps reading your post about it is a sign that i should finish the book. :)


Ciao Novice Blogger!

'Katigasan ng ulo':-)Now that we are parents - "now we know".

Try to finish the book. My husband read it first, who said its just for girls hehehe...

Thanks for visiting my 2 month old site. I'll include you in my "Must Clicks" (whether you like it or not):-)


Very nice portrait of your mom and dad.
It's been several years since both my parents passed away, yet, I always think of them every passing day. I don't know why, but my mom was always the beacon of my life.
Cheers and goodhealth....


How heartwarming Trublue, to know that your mom is the beacon of life.

There's this Mommy Network that said, "we raise future generation or future leaders" to that effect(can't remember the exact words). That's how important parenting is -I guess. Big time responsibility!

Fathers too(para di tayo guilty sa gender bias hehehe) same guidance are expected from them. Para holistic ang development, all aspects covered kumbaga.

If we're gone, our children will continue the pages of our story...Maybe that's why Trublue thinks of his parents every passing day.


Touched by your post, kabayan. Reminded me of the great times I had with my Nanay (Grandma) and Mama. Both are them are strong in character yet gentle at the same time. They could move you with their thoughts and views. And they know the value of listening to others and "pakikisama".

I miss them so much.

Novice Blogger

Hehe, sure! Thanks for the add Lovelyn! I've added you as well to my Buddies Roll.

Really? Is the book just for the ladies? Now I see why coz it was recommended to me by a lady friend. Anyway I'll still be reading it starting next week maybe during freetime.


Thank you for the comment Anitokid!

Did you know that it will always reflect on you the personalities and virtues of the people who brought you up? I'm not surprised that the Anitokid is always "kidding us not"!

Hi Novice blogger,

'Grazie' for the add! Now I've got four of you in their blog roll hehehe...(binilang pa LOL)

No, its not just for girls. Enjoy your reading.


I guess so, my friend. Such are the thoughts of the ages.

"I'm not surprised that the Anitokid is always "kidding us not"!" - Loved it! And I kid you not! :)

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