Thursday, 15 November 2007

ILARIA'S HEARTS

It started last Monday that Lukie brings home surprises for Mama and Papa. A bond paper with his drawing on it. For 2 days it was always "THE SEA CREATURES" or the drawings above.

We usually get all their works at the end of the school year except for cards or stuffs they make for special occasions like Mother's Day, Halloween etc...so this everyday present is something new.

Yesterday morning when my husband was waiting for the school bus, he told our son before sending him to school, that maybe it would be better if Lukie will bring home "un diverso designo"(a different drawing). He also suggested to the little boy to use all the spaces of the paper. Then our son came home with his 'nouvo designo' of the dessert with him near some cactus. The sun still there and the single line of blue color which is his sky. Little Dylan tore the paper so big brother sentenced it to the trash.
"Ahhhhh, Mama, there's another surprise!" Lukie said as he zips off his bag and took this out: PER LUKIE DA PARTE DI ILARIA(for Lukie from Ilaria) their teacher wrote. It was a present(more of a display of love...LOL)from a little girl to my son. NOTE: Don't miss Lukie and Ilaria under the hearts hahahaha....
He told me that Ilaria is the girl who likes him and I asked if he likes her too. My son said, "No, I'm fed up with her. She is always following me. 'Quendi, forse...voglio Madalena. E piu grande sai (Therefore, maybe...I like Madalena. She's bigger, you know)".
So what now? Would that mean my "Sibling Rivalry" readings will be put on hold for "LOVE AND RELATIONSHIP FOR 5 YEAR OLDS"?

Tuesday, 13 November 2007

SIBLING RIVALRY (Part 3)

I'm the eldest among six girls and next to me is my sister, Noeda, with only a gap of one year. Among all my sisters, she's my "fighting-mate" during our younger days. Punching, kicking, nose bleeding and shouting would often raise our Dad's blood pressure. Dismayed, he would always tell us that it would be worse if we were boys.

As we age and eventually had a family of our own, I look back at it as part of growing up. A normal stage we have to go through or a part of the process where we acted out who and what we are that time - KIDS.

Writing this echoes my father's words when we do it rough. He would say: "Enjoy these short days being together as sisters. Someday you'll leave this home and will have a family of your own. Then no matter how you would want to turn back time to be young all together again, you can't 'uray in-nanges kayu ni dara'(even if you cry out tears of blood)." Indeed, he was right!

Last Sunday, we celebrated Noemi's first birthday. My sister Noeda and his husband Irven may look tired but they did well in making my niece's day a special one.

Noeda emailed me before her daughter's birthday about her children's(Roldan-2 years old and Noemi-1 y/o) early display of what we used to do - FIGHT! My Sister said:
"They don't really fight(YET), its just that Roldan would often slap Noemi for no reason. He pushes her all the time specially when Roldan is holding food or a toy. He thinks her little sister is going to get it away from him.

For Noemi, its like like she could sense it well that there is danger when Roldan comes to her. She would always run away from his big brother. Again, like she has a wiser mind of her own, Noemi does her pay back when Roldan is asleep. She would pull his brother's hair and pokes his nose hahaha...."

Excerpt from Your Child: Development And Behavior resources:

Be There For Each Child:

1. Set aside “alone time” for each child. Each parent should spend some one-on-one with each kid on a regular basis. Try to get in at least a few minutes each day. It’s amazing how much even just 10 minutes of uninterrupted one-on-one time can mean to your child.

2. When you are alone with each child, ask them once in a while what they like most and least about each brother and sister. This will help you keep tabs on their relationships, and also remind you that they probably do have some positive feelings for each other!
3. Listen—really listen—to how your children feel about what’s going on in the family. They may not be so demanding if they know you at least care how they feel.

4. Celebrate your children’s differences. Let each child know they are special—just for who they are...read more HERE:

Saturday, 10 November 2007

SIBLING RIVALRY (Part 2)

I never met my cousin, Miss Buguias , in person. We found each other at "friendsters" and I'm really glad to be related to this nurse from Arizona. I knew her Mom who is my Dad's relative from my grandmother's side. She has her blog here: Nem Nem Ko and I'm posting her story she sent me when I asked her about sibling rivalry.

Grazie again Insan!

Miss Buguias and her sister Janice

Heads and tails! My mom, I say is a strict disciplinarian. She has been teaching since age 18 (back then teaching course called ETC ket 2 years lang, until naging bachelors degree). She is very strict not only in school, but at home as well. Me and my sister were just 20 months apart and yeah, sibling rivalry, I know about that hehehe. My mom has her own way of resolving conflicts - "Heads Or Tails?".

with their own little girls

I remember it clearly when my mom was pursuing her graduate studies, she travels from Buguias to Baguio every weekend for her classes. Me and my sister alternately go to Baguio with her. During Semestral breaks or vacations, we sometimes lost track of who went to Baguio last. Pouring of tears dont work with my mom, haan nga mabalin ti agririri! kelangan fair nga kanayon!!! She would often bring out one of her one peso coins and spin it in the air... My sister has the Head... mine the tail! Who ever wins, WINS!!! We learned a lesson right there and then... Fairness and accepting defeat.

Sometime three years ago, my daughter Kazhra and son Kaisser often argue about which tv show to watch. Adding and extra tv's in their bedrooms did not solve the problem. They still prefer to watch their favorite shows in the living room. Finally my ears got tired of the daily argument I decided to use my moms Heads or Tails technique.

Glad to share that since then (three years ago), I have never heard them argue about the remote control! But of course, they have million other things to argue)
Excerpt from Handling Sibling Rivalry:

What causes sibling rivalry? Think about it. Siblings don't choose the family they are born into, don't choose each other. They may be of different sex, are probably of different age and temperament, and. worst of all, they have to share the one person or the two people they most want for themselves: their parents...

HERE are some do's and don'ts that may be helpful in dampening down sibling rivalry within a family:

1. Don't make comparisons. ("I don't understand it. When Johnny was her age, he could already tie his shoes.") Each child feels he is unique and rightly so-he is unique, and he resents being evaluated only in relation to someone else. Instead of comparison, each child in the family should be given his own goals and levels of expectation that relate only to him.

2. Don't dismiss or suppress your children's resentment or angry feelings. Contrary to what many people think, anger is not something we should try to avoid at all costs. It's an entirely normal part of being human, and it's certainly normal for siblings to get furious with one another. They need the adults in their lives to assure them that mothers and fathers get angry, too, but have learned control and that angry feelings do not give license to behave in cruel and dangerous ways. This is the time to sit down, acknowledge the anger ("I know you hate David right now but you cannot hit him with a stick"). and talk it through.

3. Try to avoid situations that promote guilt in siblings. First we must teach children that feelings and actions are not synonymous. It may be normal to want to hit the baby on the head, but parents must stop a child from doing it. The guilt that follows doing something mean is a lot worse than the guilt of merely feeling mean. So parental intervention must be quick and decisive.

4. When possible, let brothers and sisters settle their own differences. Sounds good but it can be terribly unfair in practice. Parents have to judge when it is time to step in and mediate, especially in a contest of unequals in terms of strength and eloquence (no fair hitting below the belt literally or figuratively). Some long-lasting grudges among grown siblings have resulted when their minority rights were not protected. Click HERE for more...

Friday, 9 November 2007

MUST CLICKS

1. Boogie's Blog - I hope he will update soon. My Papa dudes (ever)!

2. BENCHWARMER(Northern Philippine Times) - The reason why we read SunStar Baguio

3. My sister Noeds has her own site. She used to be my photographer back in my younger years. When digital camera was far from existence, a full film of my vanity she all took

4. RUSSEL ARIOLA for your wedding photos or any occasions. Click his site for his contacts and samples of his work.

5. iBOONDOCK another blog from the boondocks - Bill's new corner. As the prize for all the 'Kailian's' clicking that we once blogged here - HELP BILL!

6. Page 101 - Jane found out Adobong pork and pusit is yummy. She calls it Adobasit.

7. My Good Finds. Org - Tina is successfully doing PayPerPost. This hot momma Baguio girl from Maryland USA introduced me to blogging.

9. Nem Nem Ko…. is my cousin who is a nurse in Arizona USA. We've known we're related thru the Internet.

10. The MegaMom was one of the first Mommy I've met at PINOY MOMS NETWORK. She has cute little triplets. That says why her name is MegaMom aside from being a jetsetter doctor.

11. I've met Raggold and Kengkay. They're my neighbors from Germany

12. I'm really proud to be one of the cousins of this good writer at Nem Nem Ko.

13. Me, Myself and I works as a Bible translator. Cool job, I say!

14.Lisa of Baguio Insider as she updates us with anything about our hometown Baguio

15. A hearty laugh REYNA ELENA gives me all the time. He makes blogging so much fun.

16. Ivadoy Country...in Quezon City is also from my home town Tublay like me..

17. I wish I could speak French like Mommy Analyse.

18. Teacher Julie who teaches special children gave me a FRIENDSHIP AWARD. Was sweet of her...

19. Luta, another teacher who writes at A nomad's thoughts.

20. My Blog. Ma'am Marilyn, my Business English teacher back in highschool just started this site.

21. My Misadventures is Hannah of Scraekja sister.

22. GANDANG IGOROTA rides horses which I also once love to do. We share the love of books. I like her way of writing and her piece about "CHOICES", made me hug-hug my husband

23. Firefly in July, a good writer too. She's my sister's batch in highschool

24. The Human Rights Lady Lawyer SMORGASBORD OF RANDOM THOUGHTS and all her poems, I wish I'll be her even just for one day.

25. The Broken Bow and his classy choices of entry. Impressive.. Miss Buguias we call her.19. I would love to have her job.

27 The Anito Kid will never kid us. Blogger Award for 2008 again, I see.

28. Geri is Evans mom. What a nice name "Evan" is.

29.
The Olympian Blog, Bill's third "eye" hehehe...

30. Idiosyncrasies owned by a young freelance journalist, JM Agreda . He is from Bacolod but considers himself as an accultured Igorot. I went to his site and got what he meant.

31. Miskina Ano na Isip by Will. A blogger whom I will always remember as someone who flew from California to the Phillippines for his (Mis)Adventures in Romance.

32. SaGaDa-iGoRoT.com continues to educate us about the Igorots and will also show us around Sagada here: BLOG of the SAGADA IGOROT.

33. The Worldwide Dap-ay Forums's Yoda has his own blog now. Join me as we learn more about Igorot, our people, in his Siwat’s Weblog. Let's luxuriate in his 'Jed(i)+aic' prowess and eloquence in poetry.

Thursday, 8 November 2007

SIBLING RIVALRY (Part 1)

"I hate you!", shouted Lukie to his little brother yesterday. It was my first time to hear him say HATE.

When Dylan started to crawl 3 months ago, he goes to his brother and grabs or mess up whatever Lukie is playing with. It makes Lukie angry and shouts, "DYLANNNN!" then he would clinch his fist and holds his temper to hit his little brother. Now that Dylan is walking at 11 months old, Lukie lands that fist already. Still sweet cause Lukie does not punch Dylan hard, only a slight smack just for his anger to get to his brother.

While we still find our two boy's early display of sibling rivalry cute and funny, might as well explore and learn more about it. We need to arm ourselves with reading feds that would later help us on how to deal with jealousy and competition between our two boys.

I was able to find this helpful and easy to understand site about Sibling Rivalry.

Growing up in a big family, we too have our shares of antagonism or hostility between our brothers and sisters which manifests itself in circumstances such as in the common children's family fights. Sibling rivalry is one of humanity's oldest problems. Though its a normal behavior, I quote KidsHealth to say it all: "Remember, as kids cope with disputes, they also learn important skills that will serve them for life — like how to value another person's perspective, how to compromise and negotiate, and how to control aggressive impulses".
With this, series of collected stories by friends and relatives who can relate with the topic will be posted on my next blog. I'm excited and can't wait to share it to you all!

Sunday, 4 November 2007

PINOY MOMS NETWORK

I finally signed up with Pinoy Moms Network after months of merely a fan and an ardent reader. It is a site where equally talented Filipino blogging mothers around the world share, teach and discuss about everything. From parenting to gardening, home keeping, fashion etc...you name it.

PMN has a section, Tech Momma, for mama's like me who's computer proficiency is not that impressive. Tina is one of the contributors here and it is from her that I came to know about Pinoy Moms Network .

Go check it out and tell me if I did the right thing in joining these cool hot mommas!

Friday, 2 November 2007

BILL WON!

'Auguri' to Bill - From The Boondocks, a well deserved victory! Now we can rest from clicking AGAIN and AGAIN HERE and HERE.

For the detailed results of this contest, click
TINA . Browse around also to learn from her brilliant ideas on net entrepreneurship. Her PPP achievements, in a short period of time, will make you proud you're connected to her in any way. I mean blogroll, SAHM and another Baguio girl.

While Bill is in hiding for owing everyone a cup of coffee(lol), in his behalf, let me thank you all for supporting his winnings!

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